Monday, December 27, 2010

Holidays!

Christmas is so fun! Even better when there are children about, to make the time of year that much more exciting. Most of our boys know the true meaning of Christmas and no longer believe in the man in the warm cozy red suit. We constantly hush them when others are around, so that other children can still believe.

This year we wanted to teach them about giving and the fun and joy there is in giving. That has been our focus. We want them to understand that it has nothing to do with what is under the tree, but everything to do the our Savior. We sang Christmas songs together. We read Luke 2 and talked about the amazing birth of the Christ Child. We talked about the way we should treat others. It's been a great time for teaching and learning.

The tree was beautiful and was decorated with care. That always helps bring the Christmas spirit into our home. The Christmas music played, as often as possible. Presents we wrapped. Packages were mailed. Goodies were baked. It was a wonderful Christmas.

Lyssa-loo is two. This Christmas was especially fun with her. She loved opening gifts. She loved the shoes, all three different kinds, and kept trying a new pair on over and over again.

The boys were so funny. They were so excited about some of their gifts that they were jumping up and down, screaming, giggling and smiling. They had a fantastic Christmas.

The only bummer about the whole holiday, well two bummers, was that we didn't have any family to share it with for the first time in years...and we got sick. Lyssa-loo got it first. Then Todd got it and the fever hit on Christmas afternoon. Then it hit me. So, Sunday was spent in bed, watching all the new movies we got for Christmas and solving Rubik's cubes. I was so excited to solve all 4 Rubik's cubes in the house. Not only that, it was the first time I have EVER solved one. I broke a record for myself!!! That was fun! Now it's Monday, Todd had to stay home from work, sick. We stayed in bed most of the day. I got the shakes, chills, stuffy head, head ache, runny nose...fun. So, I have watched more movies and took a nap while the kids and Todd played video games.

I hope we feel better soon. No more sugar. I haven't had sugar in the house until the holiday season, and guess what, I've been healthy. Now, when there is sugar around, and I'm eating it, I get sick. Cursed sugar. If only the silly viruses didn't feed on the stuff, I'd be okay!

Anyway, I'm grateful for health and grateful for a wonderful Christmas. I truly hope that more people will keep the Christmas spirit alive throughout the year this year. Happy New Year!

Monday, December 6, 2010

A Give-Away!

http://iamapistachio.blogspot.com/2010/12/giveaway-adorable-handcrafted-play-food.html?spref=fb

I have an amazingly talented friend who makes the most adorable felt food. I have purchased a few pieces from her for Alyssa and she LOVES to play with them. The fried eggs are so realistic and the bacon looks like I could eat it. It's so much fun! Take a gander at the link on my friend's blog and also catch the tempting foods on Etsy. ( http://www.etsy.com/shop/thewhimsicalgourmet )

Friday, December 3, 2010

Life Lessons

In my life I have learned much. I continue to learn much. I hope to be able to continually learn great things to help improve myself and my family. I find it quite interesting that no matter how hard we try...no matter how much effort we put into becoming better...there is always more to do. That's not a bad thing. It's good. Think about it....for all the time spent learning and improving...there is always more that we can learn. I won't stop here, at this moment in time, just like I am today. Thank goodness! I'll keep getting better.

I love listening to others who have lived longer than I. They have gained so much knowledge and wisdom. And I wonder...is my heart and mind open to new ideas, new strategies, new ways of being? I try...all the time...to be very open minded. No one thinks the same way, and that can be a blessing. Others' ideas give a new perspective; opens the eyes; helps to see things more clearly. The fog lifts and the light bulb turns on. Aha! New knowledge flows quickly, filling empty spaces, that were waiting to be filled.

I'm surely not done learning and I am so thankful for that. I might not have a formal college education, but I research, I poke, I prod, and turn over new rocks and leaves...looking for more knowledge. It's all around us...begging to be found.

Some knowledge comes from trials; events in our lives that cause us to learn. What a great time to take a step back and really ponder and observe and learn. What could I have done differently? What could I have worded more kindly? What facial expressions could I have changed? What reactions or overreactions could I have eliminated by taking a deep breath, stopping, and thinking, before responding?

I'm grateful for this time on earth to learn...to become a better person. I hope that when I meet my Father in Heaven again he will be pleased with the person I have become.

Monday, November 15, 2010

Our family in a nutshell

It's getting to be that time of year again when the crazy holiday bustle begins. I love this time of year. I love relaxing with my family...eating yummy treats... thinking about all our accomplishments over the year ... and thinking about our blessings.

TJ is getting more accustomed to Middle School. With a schedule change he was able to enjoy his new school much more. He still loves drawing. He continues to get better and better at it. He is very creative and imaginative. He has found that he actually enjoys reading a good book once in a while for fun. He loves to play video games...as most kids his age do. He is helpful and kind and we just think he's fantastic!

Alex loves his new school and at the same time misses the old one too. He is funny. He loves to be outside and ride his bike. He is very sweet and kind and is good with his little sister. He doesn't care what others think of him and is confident in what he likes to do. He enjoyed playing flag football for the first time this year and really enjoyed the time on the field. He loves to sing and is pretty good at it too. He gets embarrassed very easily...just like his mom!! He's a great kid! We think he's awesome!

Max loves his new school as well. He has adjusted fairly well to it. He likes his teacher, which is a plus! He continues to grow and learn so much. He loves to pretend and is fantastic at quoting movies that he likes. He loves watching "Jack and the Beanstock" and loves to quote Gilbert Gottfried's character from that movie. When a conversation reminds him of a movie...he starts quoting. We don't always know what movie he is quoting, which makes it quite interesting at times! It's quite fun! He loves to play and be silly and loves to watch his siblings play too. He is sweet and kind. We think Max is just amazing!

Colin thinks his new teacher is the nicest teacher ever! He loves to read and has improved so much this year. He is working with an awesome teacher, one-on-one, to help improve his reading skills. He continues to impress us constantly. He is so thoughtful and helpful. He knows what to do to earn brownie points!! He like to make up jokes...and sometimes they make sense!! He is a ham!! He loves to fill up the sink in the bathroom and play with toys in it or dunk his head in it. Lacking creativity he is not! He still loves to sit with Mom and Dad and be cuddled...though we don't know how long that will last for! He is almost always good for a little entertainment! We think he is wonderful!

Alyssa loves to play pretend. She is so cute and sweet most of the time! She loves to sing to her toys, and watch shows, and go for rides. She loves animals. She enjoys going out to see our friend's pigs. She loves pigs! She also likes horses and other animals. She is funny and silly and brings a smile to our faces. She is constantly saying new words...and sometimes her pronunciation is quite humorous!!!

Todd is finally done with his college classes and should get his degree in December this year! He is thrilled after jumping through so many hoops to get there. He loves his new job and enjoys traveling to Panama as often as they'll send him. He loves speaking Spanish and gets as giddy as a school boy when presented with an opportunity to use that ability. He loves being silly with the kids and bringing laughter to our home. We think he's a keeper!!! He's fantabulous!

And then we get to me. It's hard to boast about myself...I can boast about my family all day long, but to think of all the things I do well and then share them...that's just weird!! :) So, I'll give it a try. I am blessed with the opportunity to be a stay-at-home Mom. It's the most wonderful profession I could've ever chosen for myself. I love to take pictures but don't have the opportunity as often as I would like to. I love to read, and write and I'm addicted to good movies. Good meaning...a good story. If it's cheesie...it gets turned off! If it's filthy...it gets turned off too! I like a good fantasy and will read books like Harry Potter, Mist Born, Fablehaven, and Alcatraz Versus the Evil Librarians. There's so much out there to read...and so little time! I love the Gospel of Jesus Christ and am so thankful to have it as a guide in my life. It's what keeps me going each day.

Friday, October 22, 2010

Death of the Cell phone!

I didn't realize how often I used my cell phone and how much it was worth to me until I dropped it into the toilet. Yes, that's right, I dropped it into the toilet. I had a good laugh about it and so did Todd. I have teased him many times, because he takes his into the bathroom with him. And now, I'm the one who dropped it into the toilet, not the one who plays games on his while using the restroom! Then I called T-Mobile and I told the customer service representative why I needed to replace my phone. I'm so glad I could bring such joy to so many people this week with my story! No one else likes to admit they would do something like that, but I guess I just don't care what people think. I have now ordered a carrying case that will clip onto my pants and protect the phone from flying into yet another water death. They were so kind as to overnight it to me, so I have only been without a cell phone for about 1 1/2 days. Still...it's torture!! I had to take TJ's phone and use it! It makes me laugh!! What is the world coming to?

Wednesday, October 20, 2010

An answer to many prayers

I'm sitting here in tears...tears of gratitude for staff at school that are taking care of our TJ. We have spent much of our time in prayer for TJ as he struggles in this new school. For some reason he has been targeted by three boys in the seventh grade. First a boy had been teasing and tormenting him on a daily basis. That has been taken care of. Then three boys decided to corner him in the locker room recently and put him in a headlock along with a threat that if he told anyone they would kill him. I'm so thankful that he feels comfortable enough with us that he came home and told me what happened. I took care of it immediately. The next week the one who put him in a headlock received an in school suspension. Almost immediately he was called a snitch. When he told them that he wasn't the one who told, but it was his Mom, he was called a "Momma's Boy". I chuckled and said that was okay because the Stripling Warriors were Momma's Boys and they were awesome, righteous sons. I could handle that! He liked that thought!

So, these boys have continued to try to tease and torment in the hallways. They walk by and give him dirty looks or quickly thrust their head toward him trying to intimidate him. We suggested that he just continue to ignore it and look for his friends in the hallway. That worked until yesterday when one of the boys shoved him to the floor while the teachers were busy and the hallway was crowded. We pray daily for him....for strength...for the spirit to guide him to know how to handle the situations. I called today and spoke with the counselor and explained the story. She then called TJ to her office along with the principal and they created a plan that TJ is very willing and happy to follow through with. They are switching with days of the week TJ has PE and health so that he no longer has to be in any classes with these other young men. He begins the new schedule today. The counselor told him that if anyone asks why he had to switch he can tell them that Mrs. Keiser asked him to because of numbers in the classes. So, then it is her "fault" not his. She doesn't think that any of the boys who have been bullying him will even notice.

As soon as I hung up the phone I was overwhelmed with gratitude for an answer to prayer. I feel very blessed that Heavenly Father is watching out for our children. I’m thankful to all who have been praying for TJ as well.

Monday, October 18, 2010

Marriage

I have been in deep contemplation since yesterday just thinking about how to give correct or inspired advice to a friend about their marriage. I struggle with what to say and how to say it. It takes me a lot of time to ponder the situation to really see what I think is the best advice I could give a friend. I think what I have come up with is very basic and simple but it works.

First and foremost: make daily prayer a priority. Roll out of bed, if you have to, and begin your day with prayer. Through out the day stop and pray at those times when you need it or feel inspired. Pray where it's quiet. Pray where you can ponder and listen for guidance. Pray with an open heart and mind so that when you receive an answer you will have a desire to act upon it.

Second: MAKE the time to read your scriptures. I say MAKE because it's not easy to do this sometimes. Make it your priority and do it. One verse, a column, a page, or just five minutes. Whatever you need to do to get in your daily dose.

Third: prayerfully study the Marriage and Family Relations manual put out by the church. It's a fantastic book.

Fourth: prayerfully read "The Family; A Proclamation to the World". It tells what our roles are a women and men. Our rolls, as women and men, are unique and divinely appointed.

Fifth: talk to one another often. Open communication is the key to any relationship. Speak kind words. I can't stress that enough. Think of how your words would affect you if your spouse said them.

I am not an expert and I don't know everything about marriage relationships. I just know how important they are. If we take the time to work on changing ourselves instead of focusing on other's flaws, we will be much better for it in the end.

I am so thankful to be married to the best man I know. He is wonderful. He always supports me and is willing to help where needed. He is patient with my many flaws. He is my best friend. I am so thankful that my Father in Heaven blessed me with such a fantastic husband.

Wednesday, October 6, 2010

Fall is Here!

The leaves are turning colors. Here and there you can see it. The air is cool and crisp. It makes me sigh a big sigh; a sigh of happiness.

Life is busier that it used to be. TJ is in middle school and scouts. Alex is in 5th grade and has decided he loves playing flag football. I glad it's temporary because the games are on Monday nights and I would prefer to have our Family Home evening on Monday nights. Now we are doing them on Sunday evenings.

This week we found the time in our crazy schedules to play a family game of UNO. It was fun. I sat back and watched and savored the moments while the kids were giggling and Daddy was being silly. He has been so busy trying to finish up his final class for his degree and getting everything straightened out at work that there hasn't been any time to just be together. There is a light at the end of the tunnel. Soon the class will be over and he will have completed his degree! He is so excited.

It's this time of year when I think most about Maine and family. I love Maine in the fall. It's the most beautiful place on earth. Plus, family is there. That makes Maine even more special. Some day I'll be able to go visit when the leaves are bight yellow, red and orange. That's my wish.

This time of year always makes me think of my blessings:

A loving Father in Heaven
A Savior who loves us and died for us
a beautiful family
a fantastic husband
family far away
a wonderful home
vehicles that run
cute little puppy
the best friends in the world
the laughter of children
clothing, so much that it makes huge piles when it's dirty
toys, so many they seem to be everywhere
new friends
church

And so much more! These are in no particular order, just how I thought of them. Have a happy fall day!

Sunday, September 26, 2010

Wonderful Weekend

Today as I sit, wishing for something different to do, and tiring of Facebook, I decided I should blog. Last week Todd was in Ohio for the week. I was determined to get caught up on my house and it was the perfect time to do it.

I got in 3 days of exercising
completed all the kids' laundry
got the dishes all done up
worked on my calling
got dinner started before kids came home from school
helped with homework
completed dinners
went to Alex's football game and remembered all the necessities
got the boys to scouts and attended my Wednesday night meeting
felt great about what I had accomplished

Todd came home on Friday and this weekend has been a bit crazy. Toys are everywhere...I mean everywhere!! Boxes are strewn around the family room. Dishes were piled in both sides of the sink and all over the counters, stove and table. And I was about to go crazy! Luckily we had a special church activity for the Relief Society sisters in our Stake (Women's organization at church).

I was able to get out of the house and help complete some service projects for Warm Up Columbia. After which I was blessed to sit among these wonderful women, most I do not know yet but I felt of their spirits, and watch the Relief Society General Broadcast from Salt Lake. I adore listening to the General Relief Society presidency. They are awesome women who have been called to guide and direct us in our efforts in becoming more like Him.

I must confess, though, that my most favorite part was when our Prophet, Thomas S. Monson, spoke to us. I absolutely love his sense of humor. I have admired this man since I was young enough to pay attention to General Conference talks. I love the stories he tells, I love his passion for the Gospel and his love for the Saints. I have always felt a great love for this man, whom our Loving Heavenly Father called to be our Prophet today. So, when he was sustained as Prophet of the Church it was easy for me to sustain him. What an amazing man he is. I can't wait to get the November Ensign to read the message he shared with us last night and refresh my memory.

He talked a lot about not judging others. If we spent more time focusing on making sure we were the type of people our Savior wants us to be, we wouldn't have any time left to judge others. Here is a little quote from his talk:

"My dear sisters, each of you is unique. You are different from each other in many ways. There are those of you who are married. Some of you stay at home with your children, while others of you work outside your homes. Some of you are empty-nesters. There are those of you who are married but do not have children. There are those who are divorced, those who are widowed. Many of you are single women. Some of you have college degrees; some of you do not. There are those who can afford the latest fashions and those who are lucky to have one appropriate Sunday outfit. Such differences are almost endless. Do these differences tempt us to judge one another?

Mother Teresa, a Catholic nun who worked among the poor in India most of her life, spoke this profound truth: “If you judge people, you have no time to love them.” The Savior has admonished, “This is my commandment, That ye love one another, as I have loved you.” I ask: Can we love one another, as the Savior has commanded, if we judge each other? And I answer—with Mother Teresa—“No; we cannot.”"

This really made me think a lot about myself and search deep within to see where I may have made judgments when I should have been focusing on my own flaws instead. I love the quote President Monson used from Mother Teresa! It's amazing how love for others can change our outlook...and theirs as well.

Inside of each person is a spirit son or daughter of God. He loves them. He loves us.

I went away feeling uplifted and filled. I was able to get to know a few of the sisters in my new ward a little better. It was a great night. The wonderful weekend continued as I attended church meetings with my family this morning and enjoyed the lessons that were prepared and taught there. And it didn't stop there...

I went out with my new Visiting Teaching companion to see one of the sisters we are assigned to. Over the years I have learned that it is vital for women to have other women. It's so important to our wellbeing. We got lost on our way to this sister's home but eventually found our way to her sweet, comfortable home. There we visited and got to know each other a little more. We laughed and talked and shared stories.

So, when I arrived back home to the mess yet again, I sighed and decided it would just have to wait until tomorrow....when I can start all over again with the new routine I created last week....and get my home in order again. But I will have the wonderful spirit that filled my heart this weekend with me throughout the week to strengthen me and lift me and keep me going each day.

I am so thankful to be blessed to have the Gospel of Jesus Christ in my life. All the chaos of life seems less difficult with the knowledge of the gospel to guide our lives.

Wednesday, September 8, 2010

On with my Day!

Yesterday was Todd's 36th birthday. In his usual style, he had me laughing to start the day out. He was standing in front of the mirror, plucking out one white hair after another. "LOOK at this one! It's all squiggly, it's not even straight!..." Each time he pulled one out he would exclaim something new. "LOOK how WHITE this one is! It's as white as your shirt!" And the whole time he was plucking and wowing I was giggling! The signs of aging are beginning to show and yet we don't feel old. Okay, some times we feel old. We don't have the energy we once had, but our Spirits are young!

We were able to spend the morning of Todd's birthday in our first IEP meeting with the new Elementary School. What fun! They started out by telling us that they didn't understand how Alex even qualified for services in our previous school. As they continued and I stopped them and asked, "So if he doesn't qualify, what will happen to this child?" They could tell I was a bit distressed and quickly let us know that he could be put on a 504 plan which would allow for additional help. Whew, I thought, with a mental brush of my brow. I couldn't let Alex slip through the cracks. He has improved so much and needs to continue to improve.

So we moved on and decided what testing needed to be done for Alex and read through his IEP. Next we moved on to Max. His didn't take as long because Hyde Elementary has just done a bunch of testing for him at the end of the school year to assess his needs. We quickly determined what was needed there and moved on.

I think the one shocker was that there is no SpEd bus in the entire district. Todd nicely, but firmly, told them they needed to get one. I was chuckling inside. I don't enjoy driving them to and from school everyday and it does put a dent in our gas budget, but there is something I've noticed...During the small amount of time in the car I have a captive audience. Each day I ask each of the boys how their day went, what they liked about their day and if there was anything else they wanted to share. Each child gets his moment, uninterrupted. At least that's the rule. I remind them of the rule each day. I realized yesterday how much I enjoy the time, no matter how crazy, talking with the boys because once we hit that door they're done talking. They want to run off and play. So, even though it's a pain to drive them every day and walk Max to class, I think the benefits out weigh the negatives.

Max currently has a part-time one-on-one in the class room. She is there for the morning. We are concerned that once the student teacher, who is currently in Max's classroom, leaves there won't be any extra help in the afternoon. We have told them about the issues that can arise and so we wait...hoping that he will do just fine and they won't need any extra help.

We came away from the meeting feeling good, feeling like they would be taking care of our kids. It's nice to know that when your kids head off to school there are people there who care about them and their needs.

Since we have moved the one thing that I have struggled with is keeping up. The laundry is piled high all the time, the dishes are almost always piled in the sink and on the counter, the floors are in needs of being cleaned, the bathrooms are dirty, and I'm tired! I realized that I have less time now to take care of the home than I did before. Plus Todd comes home almost an hour later than he used to. By the time he gets home I should have dinner done, but I'm just barely getting kids finished with homework. Lyssa-Loo is teething and clingy. She would rather be on-the-go than at home. So I spend a large amount of time helping her to be happy, which I love. So, my question is, when is there any time to get anything done? I ask this with a smile on my face! I know that eventually we will move past this phase into a new one.

Today I am making more phone calls to find a new doctor. I keep praying that one will turn up, one that will be supportive, one who is perfect for our family.

Monday, August 30, 2010

We've moved!

Well, it's been over a month now and we are more settled into our new home. I have not taken pictures yet. I am still trying to get used to the new schedule, new area, getting sleep, etc.

This is the start of the 3rd week of school for the boys. They are all enjoying school. Amazingly enough, they all love their teachers and love their schools. The transition to a new school has been much easier than I imagined. TJ absolutely LOVES middle school! He LOVES having a locker, moving from room to room and getting to know the kids. I challenged him one day to go up and introduce himself to someone that he thinks might become a good friend and part of the challenge was that he had to find out the person's name and tell me. So, he came home from school and said, "Hey Mom, ... Sam." And he giggled and walked away! He is maturing and growing up so fast! He now has a cell phone which he brings to school. He texts once he is on the bus in the morning and also on his way home. He loves to send texts to family. He is really enjoying the new responsibilities and privileges that come with growing up! Alex has already found a couple of friends. He was so worried that he wouldn't make friends easily, but he has. He has also signed up for Flag Football here. He begged me to let him do it. I was shocked to find out that it's free. We only needed a couple of items for personal equipment and then it's free. How awesome! Max is adjusting well so far. He seems to like his teachers and is doing pretty well with a part-time one-on-one. He is making little friends all over the school, just like he did at Hyde! Colin is absolutely loving school. His teacher is so sweet and perfect for him! He didn't like kindergarten, but he loves first grade and he too has found a couple of good friends already! We have been so blessed to feel so loved so quickly here!

Our new Ward is wonderful. I feel very comfortable with them. The kids, with the exception of Max, transitioned really well at church. Max had a really hard time. He would run, kick, hit, resist, and scream when it was time for Primary. It was really hard...for him...and for me. He hasn't had fits like that in a really long time. For that I am truly grateful! At 8 years old, he's getting really strong. When a fit comes, I almost need Todd to hold him down....but I'm still stronger right now! :) The fit throwing lasted the first 2-3 weeks and now he goes right to class without a problem. What a blessing! We have already sung in the choir, have new callings, and are making friends.

But Almost everything went backwards with this move. I was prepared for ALL the things that usually go wrong when you relocate, so those things didn't go wrong! LOL! A funny one...I filled out the form to forward our mail and the post man took. It got lost and we weren't getting out mail. Many phone calls later I found out I could fill out a new form at our local post office. That finally did the trick. Thank goodness!

I've been on the search for a new doctor. I think that is one of the hardest changes of all. We had a fabulous doctor in St. Joseph who is very supportive and wonderful.

I called in advance to set up an appointment with a new doctor. I told the secretary that I needed to find a doctor who is supportive if opting out of immunizations and she assured me that this doctor would. So...today we went to a doctor. The office staff is sweet and pleasant. The doctor seemed nice and pleasant at first. Listened to everything I had to say and asked what the purpose of the was. I answered and then he very politely and with a practiced soft tone told me that my not immunizing was a very poor choice. His body language spoke MUCH louder than his words. He continued to explain that there were many diseases that my children could get that are deadly. I nodded and told him that I understood that. Then he shook his head and continued to explain that there have been larger outbreaks of diseases and that those who are contracting them are children who have not been immunized. I understand that as well. I finally smiled and as politely and calmly as I could I said, "I did ask, before I made the appointment, if you would be supportive of my not immunizing some of my children. Your office staff assured me that you did. If you are not comfortable supporting this decision I am very willing to find a doctor who does." He brushed me off with a non-visible roll of the eyes (it was felt!!) and asked why I chose to opt out. I explained that I have a son with ADHD and one with Autism and that Bi-polar runs in the family. He apparently did not feel those were good enough reasons and proceeded to tell me that there are no accurate studies to support the idea that immunizations have anything to do with Autism. Well, as you can probably guess, I plastered a smile on my face, chatted sweetly with the office staff and took Alex to school. Inside my head I was grumbling and growling and trying to focus on what Alex was telling me as I drove.

Talking to my Mom helped me calm down and bit and then I decided it was time to blog. I am now on the search again for a different doctor. I am not a fan of being uncomfortable with a doctor. And HE was certainly not comfortable with my decision. I do not enjoy being made to feel small, and he had the kind of personality that could easily make you feel poorly with out saying the words. I feel for his family! I wanted so badly to tell him off....but that would have been un-Christlike. I wish people would stop being so closed minded. We need to appreciate each others differences and NOT treat them badly just because they think differently. So, I will calmly look for another doctor! I pray that Heavenly Father with put on in my path that will work well for our family.

Friday, July 16, 2010

AAAAGGHH!!!!!!

The time is finally getting closer! It has taken FOREVER for it to come. But it's almost here! Hallelujah!!! One more week and we are on our way to our new home. Our poor kids are just ... DONE!

Things are falling neatly into place! We are so excited. I can't wait to go to girls night tonight! I need time away. I need to get rejuvenated again. I will miss these awesome friends here.

Thursday, July 15, 2010

One More Week

Only one more week until we pack up the uhaul and head to our new home. There are so many emotions running around in me right now. I want to see EVERYONE before I leave and yet and I don't want to have to say goodbye. I don't enjoy goodbyes. I never have. But this place have become my home. It is the first place I have felt at home since we moved away from Maine. These wonderful people have become my family away from family.

It's almost as bad as when I had to say goodbye to my Mom and Dad the first time. That was gut wrenching ... emotional ... and I didn't enjoy it one bit. It was harder than I ever thought it would be. Now ... I have grown and matured and I deal a lot better with separation than I did then, but it's still so sad.

I'm so thankful for technology and being able to stay in touch. And I know I will make new friends where I am going. It's going to be an awesome adventure!!
We
are
ready.
The kids are tired of waiting. I'm tired of packing!! LOL! But most of the house is packed. There's not much more for me to do. Meals have become ... interesting. There's just not a lot to make!! Prepared food, which I hate, is so easy right now. Sandwiches, mac and cheese, more sandwiches ... I can't wait to unpack my new kitchen!!!

Let the ADVENTURE BEGIN!

Saturday, July 10, 2010

A great day!

We all have those days. Those that stand out. Those that put a smile on our faces. Well, yesterday was one of those days for me. It wasn't much, but it makes me smile!

A couple of fun things happened yesterday. Todd was home for lunch and Colin asked him to come outside for a minute. So, he went out and Colin asked him to hold on to his bicycle seat for a second. Colin got on the bike and started pedaling and then yelled to Todd, who apparently was holding on for TOO long, to let go. Todd let go and away Colin went across the bumpy lawn. He did that a few times and then called to me. He wanted me to see what he had accomplished.

He was riding with training wheels just the other day but they broke. I guess he was determined to ride it himself!

So, I went out with my plate of lunch after Todd left and sat on the step. I held onto the seat to steady it and let go as soon as he started pedaling. He would crash into the fence, swing set or trees and turn around and come back for more. Next thing I know, he tells me not to hold on and that he wanted to try to do it himself. It only took a few tries and he was off on his own. Now all he wants to do is go outside to practice riding by himself. He is so proud of himself and so am I. What awesome determination he has! He set his mind to it, and he got it done! Amazing. If only more people had that kind of determination AND confidence in their abilities!!

Alyssa was next to put a smile on my face. She asked to run with the puppy. She had seen us all doing it and wanted to do the same. She held onto the leash and kept repeating, "Come on!" to Canela! Of course Lyssa only says "come", but that's okay. Canela wasn't quite sure what to think and got dragged a couple of times, but it was so stinking cute to see Lyssa walking the dog and TRYING to run.

Last night after we were done with our dinner we were playing with Alyssa and all of us were on the floor rolling a ball around to each other and then the dog joined in chasing the ball. We talked, laughed and just had a good time. It was a good day! Good time spent together! We need more of those moments. A day for smiles!

Thursday, July 8, 2010

Boxes

Boxes, boxes and more boxes. They just keep stacking up. Sorting, organizing, de-cluttering, then more boxes, boxes boxes.

Do you ever feel like it's never ending? No matter how much you go through and sort and throw away, there always seems to be more stuff to go through. I'm getting close to the end and I am so thankful! I have some kitchen stuff to pack, food storage to box up, and clothing, bedding and toys to organize and stuff into yet another box. Aren't boxes the most wonderful invention!!

I am constantly daydreaming about our new house ... where I will put things ... will it all fit ... how I will do things differently ... the new kitchen, floors, appliances, light fixtures, bathrooms ... I am totally excited!!

I think I need to get to bed early tonight. I need some extra sleep.

I am thankful! Thankful for all of Heavenly Father's wonderful blessings in our lives. I am thankful for how everything keeps falling into place. I am thankful for Todd's excitement about his new job. I am thankful for awesome friends whom I will miss dearly. I am thankful that Heavenly Father placed these friends in my path. They have blessed my life immensely. I am thankful for a wonderful family.

I feel blessed.

I am thankful for boxes!!

Tuesday, July 6, 2010

Back from our trip!

We spent the last week with family. Some we hadn't seen in 8 years and others 10. What a fun time it was...minus the close quarters!! We were packed like sardines into a trailer with a total of 22 people. Sleeping was fun! Bodies we all over the place! When Todd's parents and brother came over for meals, there were 30 people. We had a pretty good system and it went fairly smoothly most of the time.

I surely wouldn't want to live like that all the time, but it was fun for a short time.

The only time anyone had issues was when I went to take group pictures. Yikes!! But in the end it all worked out just fine.

While we were there Will, Todd's oldest brother, rescued a puppy that was going to be taken to the pound. I fell in love. And so did my family. Todd as well. That was a shocker to me. We ended up bringing home a 3 month old Chihuahua/Terrier (we think) mixed puppy. She is so sweet! Our cat is 3 times her size!!! That should be interesting. The best part...she's too small to knock us over, too small to jump on counters or tables, and too small to make a huge mess when she poops!! Haha! We are excited!

Now on to the packing!

Saturday, June 26, 2010

Time is getting short

Time keeps getting shorter. I keep looking at the calendar the the days keep slipping away. Until this week it felt like our move date would never come. Now it feels like it's coming too quickly. Ugh!

I have been doing tons of laundry so I can pack it away. I need to pack up my kitchen, but can't decide what to pack. This is the part of packing I don't really like. I can be very organized ..... until it gets really close and then I have a hard time knowing WHAT to pack and when. It's more a product of stress than anything else. I consider myself to be a pretty well organized person. And then the stress hits and messes that all up!

Now I need to pack up the office supplies. I want everything to be packed up by the time everyone shows up to load the moving truck. I have been involved in helping people move, in the past, where they had not packed anything at all. Talk about crazy. I just couldn't wrap my head around that. And I was a teenager then. I found that we get a lot more help when we have everything packed in boxes and ready to go when the crew arrives. It makes life so much more simple .... for everyone!

So, today we will spend getting rid of all the trash that is leftover from the previous owner. He left lot of junk. Every year we have taken loads to the dump. Today will be our last one. Dealing with another person's trash is no fun at all. I am hoping to leave the house in much better condition than when we moved in. Floors will be vacuumed, cupboards will be wiped out, bathrooms will be clean, and the garage will be swept.

Even though I'm excited and thrilled about our move .... I am nervous. Starting over can be a little scary sometimes. The questions roll through my mind .... will I find a dear close friend in the new area .... will I be able to find my way around quickly .... will my children make friends quickly and feel at home .... I guess we will find out soon!

Thursday, June 24, 2010

Todd's not done yet!

Yesterday we were given some very disappointing news. Todd needs one more class to graduate. He hung his head and sighed. He's been working so hard to get his degree and now it seems there's a road block on every side. It shouldn't be this hard, but he transferred schools several times. He sent an appeal to MO Western last week and we prayed hard that it would be approved. Yesterday we found out that is was denied. He has to take yet another class. Our prayers did not fall on deaf ears! Heavenly Father sees the bigger picture and knows what we truly need. If the appeal had not been denied we wouldn't have heard about another waiver he could get.

Todd works for the Air Force. He's in the Air National Guard. Currently he is working in HR and does not enjoy it. That doesn't even begin to describe how unhappy he is in his job. I'm being nice. They were very kind when the man came back from Washington, D.C. and took his old position back, Todd's job in CE. Instead of getting rid of Todd they found him a new position. THAT was a WONDERFUL blessing! Especially in this economy! I have reminded Todd and myself of that several times. We are truly blessed.

He got a new job in Jefferson City, still with the Air Force, working with the Partnership Program with Panama. He will be utilizing his Spanish daily, which he LOVES to do. Okay, love isn't a strong enough word either. He gets giddy when he uses his Spanish skills. He's like a little boy in a candy shop!

The new job is an Officer's position and is funded by the Army. They don't usually let enlisted hold an officer's position. There is a waiver for that!! So, we are waiting on the waiver.

Once he has his degree he can go to Officer's school (AMS - Academy of Military Science) and then he will be an officer and can hold the position.

The new waiver we found out about yesterday would allow him to be an officer without a degree, with conditions that he finish his degree within a certain amount of time. We are praying HARD that the waivers are signed!!

I just got a call from Todd!!! His new Commander is willing to sign the degree waiver!!!!!! Hallelujah!! Prayers are being answered!!

When Heavenly Father closes a door....he truly does open a window! I mentioned to Todd yesterday that maybe we needed this trial so that we could find the new waiver. There is always a reason, we just can't always understand it a the time.

The new and last class he is looking into will possibly be August through October of this year and AMS in January 2011. Please continue sending up your prayers in our behalf! We appreciate all the love and support!

Wednesday, June 23, 2010

Home Schooling

This topic has been floating around in my mind for the past couple of days. I have a handful of friends who Home School their children successfully. They are amazing women, wives, mothers and many other things too! Their ability to teach their children daily in addition to the normal everyday tasks is inspiring.

There are those individuals out there who think that a child who is home schooled will come out socially awkward. I think it's just the opposite. A lot of times these kids come out more well rounded and more intelligent. If you haven't noticed, there are kids in every public school who are socially awkward. I don't think it has anything to do with whether or not a child sent to public school or is home schooled at all.

I have been frustrated to find myself in conversations with others who very vocally condemn and degrade those who choose Home Schooling. Sometimes they have the gall to say these things, unknowingly, in front of my dear Home Schooling friends. I cringe inwardly when people talk down about a choice that others have made. It frustrates me and I wish I could bring their attention to the fact that they have just said something offensive and hurtful.

While I agree that we all have our opinions I also feel that we need to be careful about how we share them. I have very strong opinions about many things, but I try very hard to say them in a kind manner. Now, I am not perfect at it, and can say that I have offended my fair share of people, but I work on it constantly.

I had once thought I would home school my children. I was very certain that they would NOT attend public school. I had very strong opinions about sending them to such vile places and refused to think that I would do otherwise. Then a dear friend asked me, in the most kind and loving manner, if I had prayed about my decision to home school. I had not. I didn't think I needed to.

I pray about every major decision in my life, why wouldn't I think to pray about whether or not to home school my children? I took some time to ponder and pray and was blessed with a very clear answer.

All of my children have been attending public school. I've found that I don't have the temperament to handle home schooling. Sending my kids to school has been a blessing. Two of my children have needed extra help or special services to help them along. If they had been at home, I wouldn't have been able to give them that.

To all the successful Home Schooling Mom's out there, I salute you! You are amazing.

Tuesday, June 22, 2010

Who we are

Today I am so proud of my children. I'm proud of the people they are. There are times when I think I want to strangle my children...don't we all! Most of the time I enjoy them. Today I feel extraordinarily blessed to have them.

There are times that I am disappointed in the way my children choose to act. I know they have been taught better. But most of the time I am pleased with them. Today I am grateful that they are so creative, funny, happy and full of life. I'm grateful that for the most part they are respectful towards others, they are kind and considerate.

A large part of why they are the people they are is due to our beliefs: Our knowledge of a loving Heavenly Father who cares for us, and blesses us daily. Our knowledge of a Savior who died for us, so we can repent and be clean and return to live with our Father again one day. A knowledge of the purpose of this life and why we are here.

Our beliefs help to shape us, and mold us into the people we are meant to become. I can thank my wonderful parents for giving me a firm foundation to build upon. It has truly shaped and molded me into the person I am today.

Thursday, June 17, 2010

Vaccinations

I just received a bunch of emails from the local Autism support group. There are a few moms who are looking for doctors who will administer the MMR vaccine in separate shots. In some of the replies, of course, there are articles attached talking about how safe the vaccines are. I wanted to share my opinion with these Moms but realized that I have really strong opinions on this subject and do not want to offend any of them. So, I decided to blog about it! Here are my thoughts:

I think whether immunizations are safe is up to interpretation. They are safe for many people, but not everything is safe for every person. People are allergic to medications that others can take with no problems at all. My son has an intolerance to wheat, gluten, dairy, and casein. I can tolerate them just fine, but he will become sick.

Many doctors say that the immunizations do not cause Autism, but there is also a lot of evidence that suggests that it might be a trigger that causes the symptoms to come out. From what I understand, those who have Autism are genetically predisposed for it. That means that anything can trigger it. For my son, it was falling 7 feet and hitting his head. For some of my friends, it was the immunizations. I have one such friend who's son started having seizures the day he got his first MMR shot. Coincidence...I think not.

I have been blessed with a fabulous MD who fully supports not vaccinating my children. I have one with Autism and one with ADHD and even he feels that it wouldn't be safe for them. He highly recommended that I do not get them immunized until later in life.

The way my doctor explained it was that the dose in the shot is even more than what a normal adult would need. That's a huge amount for a tiny body. They give these to babies...in a cocktail of 2-4 different ones. No wonder our children end up with fevers and such afterwards. Now, I know some children don't have any problem at all. But that doesn't mean that others won't have problems.

Anyway, I'm just glad to know that we can opt out if we feel that it's right for our family. It's a hard decision, but I can say that out of my five children the healthiest one is the last, the one I didn't immunize at all. Lyssa has not had one immunization. She has only visited the doctor once in her 20 months. She has had a slight cold twice, but was never as sick as the boys always got at this age. It's amazing how sick Max was at a year and 2 years old. He was constantly sick and constantly had ear infections. It was horrible. We went through several different kinds of antibiotics for him in a year's time. They wanted to put tubes in, but I didn't feel it was right. I'm so glad I listened to the Spirit.

I wish I understood back then that I had many more options! Now I know.

Now they are giving the option to give the MMRV. It includes Measles, Mumps, Rubella and now the LIVE Chicken pox virus. I instantly get shivers down my spine. It isn't right for me and my family. I do know many who have prayed and know that their children need the vaccines and I support them whole heartedly. We can never make another person's decisions and we can NEVER know what will be right for another individual. It just isn't our place. I'm glad I only have to make the decisions for my family.

May the Spirit guide us in all our decisions.

Wednesday, June 16, 2010

Be Positive!

So many times we are too hard on ourselves. We only see those things we need to improve upon. We try each day to be more kind, more patient, more productive, more loving, more understanding. These and other qualities are noble and good, but do we neglect to see the good we do.

I remember a time when all I could see were the negative things about myself and I felt terrible. I was depressed. Todd made a good point. He told me to look back in my life and think about where I was in my teens, or early twenties. He told me not to look at how much I needed to change but how far I had come. Such wise words of wisdom. If we only focus on all the things we need to do to become perfect we would never see what our Father in Heaven sees. He sees our progress. He sees how we have changed over the years to become the wonderful person we are today. There will always be things to improve upon. That's part of life. I believe we need to take the time to see all the good we do. It will strengthen us and give us courage.

Satan does not want us to be happy and one of the ways that he brings us down is to temp us to focus on our flaws.

Remember to take the time today to think about all the good things you have done, and then make a plan to do more good.

Tuesday, June 15, 2010

Crazy

It seems the only time I think of something I want to blog about is when I'm busy getting other things done. I had gotten comfortable in my life here in St. Joe. I have good friends. I am familiar with the area. I can find my way around fairly well. I'd say I'm pretty happy.

Selling and buying houses at the same time can be such a pain. It has gone very well for us, thank goodness. There's a lot of paperwork and a lot of stress....worrying about whether or not the loan for the new house is going to get finished in time. I really don't relish the idea of being temporarily homeless. Sure, we have family and friends who could and probably would help us out if that happened, but it's not something I want to do.

I packed most of the house so we could show the house to perspective buyers. The house was clean and perfect all the time. Once the house sold, I didn't have to keep it perfect and it's not.

I hit the summer slump last week. I have never liked summer vacation. It's hard. I spend the whole time frustrated because the house is mess. I stay up too late trying to find a moment of kid-free time to myself to recooperate. I wake up too early to get kids onto the summer school bus. I'm so busy I can't find the time to exercise. And the cycle begins! So, Monday I got up with determination to exercise. And I did. Thank goodness because I needed the energy. Today I did the same and it turned out really good considering I spend most of my mid morning doing the budget. It's done. It looks good. I'm happy.

I have learned something about myself...a severe lack of sleep + a lack of exercising = a grouchy Mommy! Why do I allow myself to get into this summer rut each year? I know it's coming and yet I do it every time. I am determined to change this so that I can be in charge of my mood instead of my Sleep deprived, non-energetic self.

I am also happier when I make time to spend with other women. Why do I put off taking the opportunity to spend time with my friends? Good question! I get so wrapped up in what needs to get done that I neglect the part of myself that needs to get away. That has to stop!

I went to Kansas City yesterday to see Dana and the kids. We chatted and the kids played. We women need that time with other women. All women...young and old....single and married. We need to make time to spend with other women.

So, life is crazy right now...packing, cleaning, laundry, packing some more, papers to sign, emails to reply to, repairs to do, more packing, Scout camp, taking care of the family...etc., etc., etc. It will calm down again someday, but for now, it's just crazy. The countdown has begun and we inch closer and closer to closing day. We have 5 1/2 weeks until we load up the u-haul. Our last night here we'll camp out on the floor. The next morning we'll close on this house and then drive three hours to Jefferson City to close on the new house. It's exciting and scary all rolled into one. But for now...this is life. Crazy and all!

Saturday, May 1, 2010

Fun Stories

Today....I'm standing on a stool painting yet another wall and I hear,"I done...I done", followed by some mild fussing. I hollered out to Alex and asked him to check on Alyssa. He says, "Oh no...she spilled the milk." I came out of the bedroom to find Alyssa sitting at the table with about a quart of Silk soy milk poured all over herself, the table, chair and floor. No wonder she was done!! Not fun to be all wet and sticky. LOL!

Yesterday Todd told Max that is was chilly out and Max said, "It's not Chili out Dad...Chili is miles away!" What a crack up!

We drove to the Capitol of Missouri for Alex's fourth grade field trip on Thursday. Jefferson City is about 3 hours away and it's beautiful. I drove behind the bus that Alex was on, on the way there. Then Alex chose to ride with me for the ride back home. Another lady chose to ride with me, which ended up being rather nice. I don't know any parents from school, so I was a little nervous, but it worked out great. The little girl riding home with us Thursday was a chatterbox. She kept making silly noises and saying silly things. Alex, who is usually doing something similar was unusually quiet in the back seat. Finally Alex said, "Does anyone have a mega sized cork?" I had to try so hard not to laugh!!!! Has he heard himself lately? LOL! What a riot!

Kids are so fun. They can make you laugh, cry and want to pull your hair out too!! But most of the time, they bring joy.

Sunday, April 25, 2010

Sunday Bliss

Every time I finish reading a good book it runs continuously through my mind....for hours and then sometimes days. I love reading. I love writing. Both are things that help me de-stress and relax. I just finished reading The Maze Runner by James Dashner. It was amazing. It kept me wondering...what in the world was going to happen...how were they ever going to get out...when would they find out the truth...when would they be back with their families. Questions kept tumbling through my mind each time I would sit down to read. Slowly...carefully...the author reveals pieces of the truth...what's really going on. It was never dull...never boring...and very exciting. I can't wait for the next book to come out.

I love Sundays. They are a great day to just sit and relax. I don't allow myself much down time during the week. There is just too much to accomplish in not enough time. By the time my head hits the pillow at night I'm so tired that I can't sleep. Thoughts race through my head. Painting needs to be done. Packing needs to happen. Cleaning isn't happening like it should be. Stuff if everywhere. There's just not enough time in a day. And then when I should be sleeping and getting my strength back for the next day, I can't turn my brain off. Sometimes I wish there was a switch. Just flip it off....and fall asleep...with a clear mind.

Today emotions were on the surface. It started first thing this morning. I was probably just tired. Sleeping in a bedroom where everything is a wreck is less than peaceful. 3/4 of the wallpaper is off the walls now though. Tomorrow I get to finish the rest of it and start mudding the holes and sanding. Anyway, I was asked to speak in Sacrament Meeting for today. So, I had a talk prepared and I was also in charge of teaching Sharing Time to the Primary children. I spent a lot of time praying for guidance this week. I know I couldn't do it all myself. That's for sure.

We got to church on time and got the family in their seats and I headed up from to sit. I think the worst part of giving a talk in church is the waiting. Then I noticed that there were no tissues. GREAT! I am a blubbering ball of tears when I give a talk. I know that about myself...and I finally have accepted that fact! I can't change it, so why try. As I sat there, trying NOT to think about my talk, I realized that they pulled TJ up front to pass the sacrament...for his first time. Talk about getting a crash course. Learn by doing. As I pondered how scared I would be if I were thrown into that task without forewarning I realized that this was a blessing for him. I try to verbally prepare him for everything. What happens when life throws you a curve ball? There's no time for a pep talk from Mom. You just step up and do your duty, right. This is exactly what TJ needs. He needs to learn to be prepared. The older boys took him under their wing and guided him and helped him in his task. Yeah, he was nervous, but he did it...and he did a great job. So, as I watched my oldest son pass the sacrament I again was moved to tears. I furiously wiped at my face, trying to salvage the mess. But, I should have known, it was just going to get worse.

The youth speaker spoke...and it went by so quickly and then it was my turn. I got up and gave my prepared 12 minute talk. I love how the Spirit works. It guides us to say what needs to be said. I blubbered and sniffled and wiped...and there were no tissues to help me out. Believe me, I thought about lifting my sleeve and wiping, just to stop the dripping. How annoying. But I survived. After I sat down, it took forever for my hands to stop sweating, and my nose to stop dripping and my eyes to stop running. Once it stopped I calmed my feet and sat fairly still, my foot swaying back and forth. Can't stop moving!

Sharing time went off without a hitch. The children were engaged, they listened, they answered, they participated. It was wonderful. Again, it is awesome when the Spirit guides you...you can teach! I love it!

The only sad part of my day is when Alyssa gets hurt or cries...she no long wants me. I stopped nursing her when I had to get a tooth pulled just over a week ago. I couldn't take the pain and had to use the medication to help me get through. After a week without nursing she started getting angry with me. Instead of wanting me for comfort now, she wants Daddy and even TJ. It breaks my heart. It hurts and I wish I could go back to nursing her again. I hope it will eventually pass and that she will be able to find comfort in me once again. I can only hope.

Now, on to the rest of my restful day. I love having a day to just chill. The house is more quiet. The crazy stress of the weekdays is gone...for a moment or two. I'm going to go enjoy it now!

Saturday, April 24, 2010

Moving

Well, for those of you who have not heard, we are moving. Todd got a new job in Jefferson City. A job he will absolutely love. A job that is still Military. A job that is giving him the opportunity to become an Officer. He is thrilled and so happy. Therefore, I am thrilled and very happy for us. He will be working with the Partnership Program with Panama. He has a very impressive title that I can't for the life of me remember! He is amazing. He took the AFOQT (Air Force Officer Qualifications Test) and passed the first time. It's a very hard test. Yeah Todd! He has appealed to MO Western State University and they approved his appeal and therefore will be graduating at the end of Spring semester. What a huge blessing.

We have begun packing like crazy, throwing things out and giving things away. Our living room has been repainted, and rearranged. I love it. Wish I had done it a long time ago. Our hallway is now painted. The garage is organized and has a ton of stacks of boxes. As Max said yesterday when he followed me into the garage, "Holy Boxes!" The stacks will only get bigger! We are going to remove the wallpaper in our bedroom and paint it this week along with Alyssa's room. So, if you don't see or hear much from me, that is why. I am crazy busy!

We are excited and sad all in one. We love St. Joe. We love the people. We love the ward here. It has become our home. I never thought I would be able to say that, but it did. Moving will be very hard for me, but I am very optimistic. I am looking forward to making new friends, having a new home to decorate my way, and to just experience what ever it is that Heavenly Father has in store for us.

Sunday, March 14, 2010

Dear Friends

A dear friend's blog post really made me think. I spend far too much time in my house, cleaning and cooking or taking care of children or reading or whatever. When do I get out and spend time with my dear friends? I have been blessed with many friends at Church. They are my family away from family. Lately I feel like I have lost touch with a lot of them. I stay at home far too much....too busy to do anything else. There is always something that just can't wait until later....but couldn't it?

We don't know each other as well as we should. I think about the beginning of the Church and how the sisters did everything together. They gardened together, they taught each other, they sewed together, they raised children together...They relied on one another far more than we do now. But I think they knew something that sometimes we forget. We need each other. We need to spend time with one another. Every time I allow myself to get out and enjoy the company of other good women I come home feeling better....lifted up....my burdens lighter.

The Savior can't be here, in person, to listen but he can send a dear friend in His place with a listening ear. He can't help take care of our children, but can create a wonderful friend with whom you feel safe leaving your children. He usually lifts our hearts by sending us a treasured friend.

Are we taking the time to sincerely get to know others? To create lasting friendships? Do we ask questions in conversation just for conversations sake or do we truly care? I try to care. I want to know what is going on in the lives of others so that I might be able to be of help in some way. If I can bring comfort I want to be able to. And then when I need it, they will be there for me. But if I don't get to know these women they won't feel comfortable sharing their lives with me. If we don't ask questions sincerely and get to know others, then we will never be able to reach out when someone needs us...in answer to a prayer, whether spoken or just felt.

I truly believe that we can be an answer to someone's prayer.

Monday, March 8, 2010

Let's start fresh

It's a new day, new week and I am ready! I am going to do better today listening to my children. I am going to get more laundry folded and put away. I am going to say kind things to my family and think before I speak.

I am not always very patient with my family. I wish I were more so, but I'm not. Having OCD can be very difficult at times, because I expect too much from others. My expectations have decreased dramatically since having children though. I just know that there are not enough hours in a day to complete everything that I want to have complete. My house can not be perfect all the time. And right now...it rarely is perfect! Having five kids just does that to a person! I have to not worry about it!

I have done a lot of looking withing myself this last week. Pondering. Trying to figure out how to improve our home. What I realized, silly me, is that it all starts with me. They all take cues from Mom. Even Dad takes cues from Mom. If I am tired and grouchy, guess what...they are grouchy. If I am relaxed and just chillin' out...they are too. For the most part anyway.

So, after a rough morning getting the kids ready for school, I decided that it is all mental and I NEED to change the way I look at things. I need to be more positive, more patient. I need to look for the happiness around me. I need to point out all the good things my kids do and say. So, I am going to begin today. I am going to do better. Be a better person and try to teach my kids to be better people too.

Okay...here goes....

Friday, March 5, 2010

Tender Mercies

Okay, so we all can find our Tender Mercies if we look. Yesterday after having a migraine all day and taking care of a very fussy little lady, I handed her to Todd and headed to the hall bathroom to get something accomplished. I started patching up the holes in the walls and sprayed the ugly border down with some vinegar. I thought, maybe this border will come off...I'll at least try. So, I was sanding, and mudding and spraying up a storm. And then the borders peeled off rather quickly. Not only that, but once I got them removed I was able to scrape the glue of the wall too. YES! The wall is all smooth! Hooray! My spirits lifted and I finished the job and went to make supper.

It's amazing how just that once small thing can make you feel so much better. Once of the Lord's Tender Mercies. I don't think I could have taken anymore frustration yesterday and He knew it. For that I am thankful!

Tuesday, March 2, 2010

The gift of sight

I am thankful today for the gift of sight. We went to pick up Max's new glasses tonight and on the way home the sunset was beautiful. Scattered clouds, some in wisps, some in clumps. Blues, pinks, oranges and purples. Golden glows across the tree tops. What a pretty sight! I am grateful to my Father in Heaven for blessing me with these tiny gifts that bring joy. Just being able to get out of the house after sitting with a sick baby for two days was a blessing...and then I got to see this wonderful sight and share it with two of my boys.

Monday, March 1, 2010

Snuggle time

Oh the sweet, sweet joy of holding a baby. I just love when my little ones climb onto my lap and lay their heads on my shoulder and snuggle in. It is healing, it is uplifting, it makes me happy. They get all warm and cozy and your spirit speaks to theirs as you snuggle in close.

I wish the snuggles came more often than they do. I will take them when they come, and soak them up while I can! My babies have not been big snugglers, so it is truly a gift when they choose to find comfort in just being in my arms.

Today my little Ladybug is sick. She is snuggling and warm. She has red, rosy cheeks from laying on me. It makes me sad to see my babies feel sick, but I haven't minded that she just wants me to sit and hold her. So, HGTV here I come! I got to hold and snuggle my sweet little girl while I indulged on one of my secret addictions! Okay, it's not so secret, but it truly would be an addiction if I allowed it to be. I love to watch all of the redesign ideas. It makes my gears turn round and round!!

So, even though the reason Lyssa is snuggling is due to feeling quite yucky, I still have enjoyed the blissful moments of snuggle time when our spirits have bonded. It truly is a gift. Have you had your snuggle time lately?

Friday, February 26, 2010

I feel the Spring Fever coming on!

I know the snow is still covering the ground. The temperatures is still low and it doesn't feel like spring quite yet, but I am itching to start my spring cleaning. I could be because of all this talk of possibly having to move to a new house and needing to get this house ready to sell. I see cobwebs everywhere, and fingerprints smeared on the walls, toy marks on the floors and muddy doggy prints on the linoleum. It doesn't help that I have been sick and couldn't do much of anything for 2 full days. That makes me want to go nuts! I am finally feeling a bit better and I just want to be 100% so that I can get out and do things and clean my house and.....

You name it...there are a thousand things I could be doing. I tried out a new recipe tonight too. I love to bake and I have refrained because I have been doing Weight Watchers and didn't want to screw up my success. But...alas...the muffin tins are calling to me....

So, Todd applied for a new job. A job that he would absolutely LOVE. A job that would require him to use his Spanish speaking abilities frequently. A job that could potentially mean better pay. A job that would mean that we have to move away from our wonderful beloved home, and friends in Saint Joseph, MO and move to an area near Jefferson City, MO.

Sniffle....sniffle...

Okay...I've done my crying for now. It makes me sad, but I can't stand seeing the sad countenance of my wonderful husband when he comes home from a job he doesn't enjoy. He goes each day because he knows that he needs to. He goes because it is his responsibility. He is wonderful. He comes home and tries so hard to keep his job at work, but when I can see it in his face...he is sad at work...it makes me want to cry. I want to see my husband happy at work again.

I asked him to pray about what to do and I left it in his hands and told him when he decided, then he could bring it to me and we could pray together.

Do I want to move...heavens no. But if the Lord wants us to move then He will make it happen. He will provide the way for us to do this. As Nephi said, "I will go and do the things which the Lord hath commanded, for I know that the Lord giveth no commandments unto the children of men, save he shall prepare a way for them that they may accomplish the thing which he commandeth them." (1 Nephi 3:7)

If we are meant to move, then the Lord will provide the way and everything will fall neatly into place. I have seen it happen so many time. I have great faith that it will happen again if we are meant to go.

I also have faith that He will help ease the sadness that will come from leaving my wonderful friends. He eased my sadness when I had to leave my family behind in Maine. He will do it again.

I am so thankful to be so blessed. I am thankful for a wonderful Husband, for loving parents who taught me the gospel, for extended family who love and support us, for 5 awesome children who constantly teach me to be a better person, and for the most wonderful friends who love me for who I am; who accept me and forgive me of my faults; who are always there for me. I am truly blessed.

Before we know it the snow will be melted away, new grass will begin to sprout, the birds will again fill the trees, new life will emerge, and warm weather will appear. And then......it will get really really really HOT!!!

Enjoy each day. Find joy in each moment. For we are all blessed!

Saturday, February 6, 2010

Never Say Never!!!

I have learned over the last few years that it is not a good thing to say I will Never do something because inevitably I end up doing it. Then I chuckle to myself...lesson learned...and do the thing I said I would never do. I'll give some examples. I have a wonderful friend who bought a house and it was a split level with the two car garage as part of the basement and in the back yard sat an above ground pool.

#1 - I said I would never buy a house where the garage was a part of the basement because it takes out a lot of storage space. Good point...but the house we currently own is almost exactly the same setup as my friend's home.

Never say never!

#2 - I said I would never buy a house with a pool in the backyard because it would be too much work. Yup...it is a lot of work...but our kids love our pool!

Never say never!

There is a Tim McGraw song that says Never say Never and I completely identify with it!

Next item up for examination...I have another dear sweet friend who nursed her babies for a much longer time than I ever have. Her youngest was nine months old and she couldn't leave him with anyone because he would cry so much. I've told her this before...so this is not news to her! I said I would never have a child who was so attached to me that I couldn't leave them with anyone. LOL!

#3 - I had my little girl about 15 months ago. I chose not to immunize her and one of the doctor's recommendations was that I should nurse her until she was 2 years old. She is now 15 months old and is still nursing, but the best part of all is that I can't leave her with much of anyone without her screaming. It's terrible. She isn't even comforted by Todd, much of the time. And this friend of mine just laughs at me.

Never say Never!

Why do we make such rash judgments? I see how is it so silly and yet I will do it so quickly. For one...it is being judgmental of others and the choices they are making and then for another it is unkind. So I am trying really hard to remember not to say those words..."I'm never going to do that".

One of the hardest decisions I have had to make came recently. I have fought it. I have talked several times about how I would NEVER do it. And here I am again. Doing what I said I wouldn't. I have felt very hypocritical. I still feel badly about having to make this decision, but I know that it is right.

We have a son, Alex, who has ADHD. We have tried every remedy that I could find. Every supplement that I could afford. Even the gluten free/casein free diet was tried for six months. Each of these items would work for a time and then stop working. Alex has a really low self esteem. He will tell you he doesn't think he can do things. He doesn't think that he is very smart at all. He thinks he can't read very well. He doesn't have very many friends at school. This year is the first year that his grades have been really sliding. In the past he had A's, B's and a few C's. I figured that was pretty good considering that he was struggling. That's average. So, I continued trying the natural remedies.

This school year, however, he started out doing a fantastic job at school and gradually everything has begun slipping. He was almost kicked off the bus for bothering other children relentlessly. The Principal and I worked together and he was able to bring his MP3 player on the bus so that he would leave the other kids alone. Thankfully that worked really well. He is being sent out of the classroom to do his work because he gets distracted so easily. He wasn't finishing his work because he couldn't concentrate. His grade card showed one F, a couple of D's, a couple of C's and an A and a B. That F just blared at me. It was fluorescent. I felt so bad for my Alex.

I just so happened that not too long after that we ran into a Sister from church in the store and some how we got on the topic of ADHD. She has triplets and they each have a different form of ADHD. After a lot of work trying to help them she put them onto a medication that has worked wonders.

As she told me her story about her son who asks for his meds because he knows how much better he does when he takes them, I cried. The Spirit spoke to me. I knew that I needed to pray about what to do to help Alex. So, I spent a lot of time praying. I will not just jump into something like that without first knowing it is right. So, after much prayer and pondering a thought came to me that just blew me over. "How long will you let Alex suffer while you continue trying to find the right natural remedy?" At least it was something to that effect! Right then and there I knew what I needed to do. I didn't want to do it, but I knew. I put it off. I waited. I felt like a hypocrite. I wanted to help Alex. I just couldn't watch my child suffer through life anymore. So, finally I called the Doctor. I was nervous to even go talk to him. I love this Doctor, and I don't say that loosely. I do not like very many Doctors but Heavenly Father blessed me to be able to find this one. He is great. He is supportive of the natural and is a wealth of knowledge about the natural. I prayed for help as I talked to him. I explained why I felt we needed to try something (all the while holding tears back) and this wonderful man just nodded in acknowledgment.

He took a moment to talk to Alex and explain what we were talking about. He put it into words that Alex could understand. It was fantastic. He told Alex that there is nothing wrong with him but that there is something very right with him. He explained that Alex's brain goes so quickly that when the teacher and students are talking it's like they are talking r e a l l y s l o w l y. After a few minutes of listening to the doctor talk really slowly (to give me an example) I was frustrated. He said that's what it is like for Alex. So we need slow his brain down a little bit so that he can catch what everyone is saying without getting frustrated. The Doctor told him that he is a very smart boy and that by the time Alex is an adult he will probably be smarter than the Doctor. He also said that most of the really neat inventions that are created come from people with ADHD. They are really intelligent people with a lot of creativity.

So, after some advice from the Doctor I went home feeling a lot less like a heel. Friday morning we tried the medication for the first time. I wrote a letter to school informing them and letting them know that I need to know if they see any adverse side effects.

Alex came home and I asked him how his day went. He sent it went "Amazing"! He finished up a pile of work that he had been unable to finish before because he was so distracted. He also was not sent out of the room to work. He was able to stay in his class. That alone is worth it. I don't care what people say. I know there are many who will disagree with the decision that we have made, but I KNOW with all my heart and soul that I did what I needed to for Alex....NOT for me. That is all that matters. Heavenly Father is the ONLY one who knows what will help Alex the best. Not me. So, I went to Him for help. So many times the answers I get are not what I want to hear, but they are always what will be best.

I am thankful for a loving Heavenly Father who is patient with me as I stumble through life. I am grateful for family and good friends who are supportive especially when we have to make hard choices.

Wednesday, January 6, 2010

January 2010

The holidays are over, the dried out Christmas tree lays haphazardly in the falling snow beside the back door, the house is cluttered with toys, the dishes are piling up, the mail is overflowing from the mailbox...

School has started again and I guess it is time to put my house back in order. They canceled school yesterday for -14 degree weather. Yikes! Today there is an early out. I wonder if I will get time to clean and declutter my house!!

I love sharing the holidays with my children and have a lot of fun with them while they are here...but they have caught cabin fever. They can't go outside, or don't want to, because it's so cold. They are tired of playing with each other because that is all they have done for the last few days! They fight, and yell and scream and start hitting and kicking. I strongly dislike wrestle time, as it causes harm to others. So, I was so hoping for school to start....and yet...I want to sleep-in some more!!

We will see what the next couple of days brings. It is supposed to be even colder. Yeesh! I wish my kids liked to read! TJ does but the others don't very much. I need to find a way to change that.

So, on to the decluttering of my home. I only have about an hour before they come home. I better get busy!!